This has really helped me with work but can help with your entire life.
Author: Liz Frome
It can be a lack of gratitude that often keeps us feeling down on those hard days and I wanted to give you ideas to help us not get down or help us regroup.
An example: I practice this ritual each morning when I get up and am getting ready or when I am walking back to work from my morning workouts; this ritual can turn hard days into easier ones, and difficult situations into better ones and it does work, as I handle stressful situations much calmer. I call it the ritual of gratitude. (It helps me to do this first thing or when I have time alone; I feel I do not rush, and I have a clearer thought process.)
Of course, gratitude is such a fundamental ritual, and yet it is one we often forget to practice, or we do not spend time thinking about gratitude. But when we do practice or take the time to focus on gratitude, it can quickly change both our minds and our lives. (It is easy to get upset with a loved one but when I find myself going into that space, I take a breath and remind myself what they do that makes me smile. The thought of being upset leaves quickly. I try to do this with work situations also!)
Let me give you an example: Work can be quite stressful, and for my work it depends on the people that cross your path. People can be very unpredictable and when I find myself stressed out, I stop to take a breath and say how grateful I am to have these people as I would not have a business.
If things get Very difficult, I stop and take the time to write out a list of everything I am profoundly grateful for, especially if everything is going wrong. Sometimes I end up with an extensive list, and I still have some of the lists hanging by my desk today. (The other thing I like to do is hang by my desk the reason I work. When things get overwhelming then I look to the right and the things I have posted make me smile and remind me why I come to work each day. On the top of my list is to travel and see the world.)
Some of the key things on my grateful list include:
I am married to an incredibly supportive, encouraging, fun person.
I am alive.
I have a healthy body and always seek to improve my health.
I have a roof over my head; that we have made into Great home.
I love the Bay Area and what it has to offer.
I love volunteering in a variety of ways but truly love helping the LABS!
I have wonderful friends.
I can travel and seek new adventures.
I love my work and the space I have created for my work.
I have a wonderful staff.
I have wonderful clients.
I can see the sun rise and set.
The list keeps going and going and changing and changing, of course, but you get the idea. The little yet marvelous things I was taking for granted every day were now in black and white right in front of me. The challenging times I was struggling to deal with did not suddenly vanish, but things were put into better perspective. I was no longer focusing solely on the challenging times with tunnel vision, but instead expanding my vision into a small list of amazing things. (My example is a small list, and I am grateful for a lot of wonderful things in my life; I love the life I have created and always try to remember my glass is over ½ full.)
Yes, there are HARD parts of my life, and it is OK to feel the stress these bring. But it is also important that I remember the bigger picture of my life too, and to also remember that even challenging experiences make life as great as it is. Life would be impossible without challenges. There is no happiness without some sadness—one requires the other. (The key is to recognize these challenges and to step back and remember the grateful list or create a new grateful list.)
I have used this same process dozens of times when things get stressful, and it continues to make a difference in getting through a variety of situations:
Some examples:
When someone upsets me, I try to find one thing about them I’m grateful for.
When I catch myself procrastinating on a task, I look at why I’m grateful for the opportunity to complete the task.
When I get sick or injure my body, I focus on how grateful I am to be alive and able to work on healing.
This is incredibly difficult for me as I am a very active person, and it is not easy for me to sit still. When I do have to sit still; I remind myself I need to work on this lesson.
When I lose someone, I love, I grieve, but I am also grateful for the time and experiences I shared with them.
When something negative happens with the work I do, I remember to be grateful for the ability to work with others, and that these challenges allow me to grow.
When people upset me with my volunteer work, I remember why I am volunteering, and it is for the dogs.
The bottom line is that the art of being grateful on hard days starts with me/you. And make no mistake about it: the secret to being grateful is no secret. You choose to be grateful. Then you do it again and again. If you forget, begin again.
A few minutes per day spent journaling a gratitude list, or just reflecting on what you’re grateful for now, can change your life. Do it every morning or evening, by setting a reminder alarm if you must, and see how it affects you.
Do not rush through it either—don’t do it mindlessly. Really try to feel genuine gratitude in your heart and mind for everything you list. Focus on what makes you happy in your life. We all have been through a lot, but we have grown a lot through the ups and downs. Give yourself credit and gratitude for how far you have come.
“Gratitude is a way for people to appreciate what they have instead of always reaching for something new"
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